Today’s guest blogger is Susan Cain, author of QUIET: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, available today! Are you an introvert dating or. 23 Struggles Of Being An Extrovert Dating An Introvert Talking about feelings is so much fun. 3. Feature your extrovert. “On social media networks, extroverts are actively posting pictures and status updates to share their exciting lives with the world.
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You two often disagree on social plans. Most of my favorite activities involves getting together with groups of friends and hanging out, whether recording podcasts, at parties or having folks over to watch Archer and Venture Brothers. Professionals Therapist Login Therapist Signup. Someone who was as introverted as me but who didn't have that set of desires would be hard to date, though. Here's where you'll find all of the info you need on safe teen sex, getting tips on how to handle relationships, and answers to your sex questions.
жутких зомби: Dating an extrovert
There's a lot of confusion about what saying you're an "introvert" actually means. It doesn't actually mean that you're always socially anxious, shy, a deep thinker, or hate parties. So after a long party, extroverts are buzzy and happy, while introverts are drained and need to go sit somewhere quietly for a while. Introverts like social time as much as the rest of the world: I'm in an introvert-extrovert relationship.
My dude loves people and huge gatherings; after a day of meetings and eight lunch and coffee dates, he'll come home cheerful. I handle people much more easily one-on-one, and find myself tiring very quickly from group interactions. My mates know this well, and it's pretty common knowledge that during parties — which I love hosting, by the way — I'll often quietly disappear for ten minutes to recharge a bit.
Apparently this match-up between introverts and extroverts is fairly common , and it brings out the best in both of us. If you're in the position of being an extrovert dating an introvert, here are eight tips that should keep both of you happy. If you date an introvert and go to parties together, you're going to need a game plan.
The introvert is going to get tired out and either need to go somewhere else or go home and rest after awhile, and this is something you should talk about ahead of time. Make sure it's possible for them to go home separately if they need to, have a private signal that means "I'm exhausted," and figure out the easiest way for them to slip out.
My dude knows everybody , and can talk to them at great length wherever he is: It's now accepted that if I've used up my social energy for the day, I'll drift off from these conversations and look at something else, or just quietly listen from the sidelines. This is a massive relief to me: He never makes me feel bad about it, and after I greet the person I'm free to go. Get to know your introvert. When do they start drooping? How much quiet time do they need before they're up and ready to talk to people again?
What particularly tires them out small talk, heated passionate conversations, big groups? It's a bit like caring for a plant, except the plant is hot and gives you kisses. Know the particularities of your partner and react to them when you see them.
This can be one of the trickier things to negotiate in an introvert relationship: You can bond just as well, and feel just as connected, by being quiet in the same room — or, indeed, letting them be quiet and read in the next chair while you chat on Skype. Hold hands, touch feet, generally keep physically connected while they do their thing. It's comforting and intimate.
Introverts can also enjoy social situations. It's just a matter of dosage. So don't deliberately leave your partner at home while you go to parties or gatherings because you think they won't enjoy them, or be surprised when they want to host a party; introverts get lonely too! And even extroverts can have their quiet moments; it's very rare to be entirely one category or the other.
The necessity of withdrawal for introverts shouldn't be overstated. It makes them good at self-reliance and working independently, and is an asset, not something they should be trained out of. It's also not a personal attack on you or your love. When you've been together with an introvert for a long time, you can become part of their social recharging, rather than a drain on it this can take years, but it happens.
Until then, try not to regard their need for withdrawal as a reflection on the relationship, lashing out at your friends, rudeness, or anything other than what it is: Introvert-extrovert matches need to find stuff that feeds both elements.
Introverts may not enjoy crowds at clubs after a certain point in time, and you might get bored in situations with low social requirements. Whether it's browsing stores, walking around interesting areas, traveling together, playing video games, taking in films, or just pursuing different interests while physically in the same space, it's good to compromise.
It can be tricky to see an introvert's sit-quietly time as fun if you're the kind of person who gets bored and itchy after six minutes. But it needs to happen, so change your perception of it. It's now recognized that a few moments of silence and listening to your own body every day have health and psychological benefits , and that peaceful isolation is part of a strong relationship.
Leaving them alone to get other things done is perfectly fine; don't feel the need to baby them or treat them like an invalid. They're not broken; they're just introverts. Homepage News Entertainment Beauty Fashion Lifestyle Books Tech Flowcharts. Company About Us Advertise Apps Labs Terms Privacy DMCA Contact. Have a get-out-of-the-party game plan.
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